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February 5, 2023


Graham(minutes), Karen, Catherine(new), Will(new), Ryan(new), Russ, Eske, Leah, Dwayne, Paul, Cory, Kate, Bernard, Cayla, McAllen, Logan, Ninka, Phoenix, Chinhae, Josh, Jill, Philip, Lyssa, New person(on phone), Yarrow

Meet and Greet

Catherine 2nd meeting - added to wait list
Ryan 2nd meeting - added to wait list
Will 1st meeting
New person 1st meeting

Review of Minutes

Previous minutes pass

Wiki Updates/Announcements

Josh: Lyssa is food buyer, Paul and Ninka are running for events coordinator, voting ends Wednesday, please vote for somebody.

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Agenda Item 1

(Steward) (Jill, Joshua, Corey, Kate, Chinhae, Logan, Phillip) EsKae has moved and thrown away property that is not Eskae’s. They were asked in a mediated meeting to no longer use Jill’s things. But they have continued to do so. Some of the property moved and thrown away was very sentimental. They also burned a pan that was a gift from a deceased friend. This happened after being told to not use Jill’s property.

EsKae has made unwanted sexual comments to other members through text. Further details of this will be given at the meeting.

EsKae was also told to stop turning the AC off as it makes her room sweltering hot if they do so. They continued to turn it off. They were told to stop leaving the door open, slamming it in passive aggressiveness and leaving it unlocked. They have continued to do that as well.

EsKae is irresponsible in consideration to Jill with how they treat their bowels.

EsKae also harassed Phillip by spreading false roomers about him. EsKae had to be approached and told to stop. Further details of this will be given at the review.

EsKae also leaves their dog locked in their room. It barks/cries constantly disturbing Jill. EsKae was approached to stop doing this and they have not complied with letting their dog out of their room when they’re gone. The dog has little discipline and has eaten the crotch area out of Jill’s underwear.

Paul will facilitate this item

Paul reads entire agenda item

Josh: Eske made up story that Philip was walking dons dog to get access to key to unit so he could get access to children. They could have spread this rumor.

Eske: doesn’t believe that about Phil, made some comments shouldn’t have made.

Phil: Eske has treated him poorly and made accusations against him, his case manager is not happy about it.

Eske: I am sorry, I care and respect Phil. Wants to help Phil I fucked up.

Don: Phil has walked his dogs for months, the kids feel fine around him, Eske could have talked to don if there was any issues. Not a good act. Put Philip in danger with what they did.

Eske: Still getting to know people here, still learning how to deal with people, apologizes for carelessness.

Logan: The treatment that eske has given to people of color is not good. Eske first targeted Philip, then was going to start issues with Bernard, then Chinhae and Dal. Treatment of all minorities is poor.

Eske: came here because they believed this is an anti racist coop. Wants to work on and fix problems. Want to use any privilege to make coop and work a place were racism dies.

Don partner: kids know boundaries with Philip, and Philip knows boundaries with kids. Has known Philip for a long time, he’s been good.

Cory: We hear about things and learn about them at the coop. Cory heard the rumors and talked to Eske for 10-15 minutes about their behavior and how it can be considered harassment. Made it clear this behavior is not tolerated and will get you kicked out. Eske still spread rumors and moved on to Bernard and made up stories and gossiped about it to people. This is harassment. Cory could have member reviewed first time, but he gave some leeway and time to improve, no improvement was made.

Jill: Learned about Eske’s behavior from member review, had to tell Philip and Don about everything. This was targeting Philip, not helping children.

Bernard: Cory and Kate informed him that Eske was spreading rumors around the coop and neighborhood about him. You can want to know things about people, but brining up peoples past and spreading rumors about him is putting his and everybody’s life in danger. People will be targeting us here because of this. Nothing this bad has ever happened since he lived here. This was way worse than any other problems. Eske attacked Don and his people as well. Cannot trust a work they say again. Is distraught with behavior toward everyone.

Eske: Bernard, I fucked up, I’m sorry, I hope there is a way to make it up but respects your past. I will leave if that what we want

Dwayne: Eske should have never got anyone involved besides affected people. Should have never done this, should get on hands and knees and beg for forgiveness

Eske gets on hands and knees on the ground.

Philip: does not feel safe with them living here

Josh: in police accountability, sex offenders need to be given a second, we have taken on responsibility to behave well

Bernard: with his situation, he has done his time, has shows respect to everyone

McAllen: this is a serious accusation that is well deserved, will say Eske seems generally remorseful. Some people take no responsibility for anything, that was terrible, Eske seems remorseful through.

Chinhae: this is about race oriented discrimination, asks if this is cool. Why do you have a problem with minorities, mostly black men, but him as well. Knew Eske gagged when meat was cooked. Feels they have treated the minorities poorly. Seems remorseful but but can’t believe it.

Eske: what can I do to build back trust?

Chinhae: not having white sage would be a good start

Cory: a member review could have been done, but he didn’t want to drag everybody’s past out in a meeting. Hoped to avoid this whole thing. Had an opportunity to correct actions but didn’t.

Don: Didn’t know about attacking others. When he saw them in doorway, wanted to address it at the time, but waited until the meeting. This behavior is fucked up. He will take care of the kids, what do they have against these people? Talk to people if you have an issue with them.

Russ: Does eske have consciousness of what they’ve done? What were they thinking?

Eske: I grew up in a society that taught the a lot different. Ignorance and stupidity is why.

Kate: why did you specifically do these things, why look up past and spread rumors about them. Specifically.

Eske: works with kids and knows its important to talk about stuff

Kate: why did you look them up?

Eske: knows this is a place where people with a past come. Has anxiety and no therapist. Was trying to reach out and figure out how to a part of culture of safety and failed.

Bernard: they say they work with children, but what prompted you to look up Phil and Bernard specifically?

Eske: only them came up on website were they typed stuff in

Leah: you came to me with other problems recently, shy not mention anything? The stated motives do not line up with actions.

Quinn: How did they only find these 2 people?

Cayla: it was an address based search right?

Eske: Yes

Jill: They threw my stuff away. After being specifically asked not to. Removed stuff from a box twice, then threw box away. Broke jug. Threw away sign. These were owned by her dead father. Jill hid a sign and told Eske it was not trash, they found sign and put it in their own trash. They used their pan, and eventually ruined it after being asked not to twice. Threw away salt shaker from mother.

Eske: Was trying to clean. I fucked up. Got a new pan. Is sorry.

Jill: you looked for sign and took it and put it in their own recycling.

Eske: sometimes I use things out of the recycling bin.

Don: Is in contact with Aaron. Arron says that Eske has thrown away their stuff, like a box for truck parts, is mad about it. What is Eske going to do differently?

Eske: will reach out to people and work with them. Will leave if Philip feels unsafe regardless of house vote

Josh: all opportunities to correct behavior have been ignored.

Kate: Eske put down “unconsensual grief counciling” on Jan 27th.

Eske: that was childish and stupid, should have known it was public for people to see

Logan: was two hours away when they heard form Eske that they threw out a box and disrespected the memory of Jills father. Tone seemed sarcastic and uncaring. Seemed to want to get approval for actions. Understands venting, but this was unreasonable

Eske: when they learned they threw away box with note, they got in dumpster to try to find it.

Logan: When you have roommates, you have to get their input if you’re going to throw stuff away. Even with a non responsive roommate Logan had respect.

Jill: the problem is that they are concerned with welfare of dog. Dog is in room form 6:50am to 4ish, gets a short walk then is back in room. Dog hides in Jills room to avoid getting locked in room.

Eske: Cats peed on bed, so leaves dog in room were dog is safe. Has started walking dog more and want best for dog.

Josh: dog was being locked up before cat peed on bed. It is tough for a roommate to have dog barking constantly. Dog is not well trained or disciplined.

McAllen: When they first read about that on member review, it was tough to hear about treatment of dog. Wants to hear about why eske did this.

Eske: If anyone want to come hang out with dog while they are gone, whey can do that.

Logan: We have all shown love of dog, it has been shown that people have talked to eske about it. Putting tea tree oil on dogs is harmful. Dogs can die from poison on them. Eske tried to justify use and recommend it to Logan, This shown lack of consideration for criticism.

Phoenix: if this dog is important, why not use services available to walk dog? Bringing up that people can walk dog is a bandage.

Logan: hasn’t seen Eske talk to anyone about about help with dog.

Josh: was depending on ride for other people. Used Eske to to get to a few places. Reimbursed eske each time. Wanted to set up a time to discuss behavior. Eske replied “only for people who want rides daddy”. This made josh feel very bad about someone that thought they were a friend to treat then that way

Jill: eske had a loud conversation about trying to get a member of the coop into their kink.

Eske: has offered rides to everyone in the coop. Is sorry. Josh brought this up in commons, and they felt bad about it. Fucked up by making comment.

Lyssa: Saying stuff like that to people is uncalled for. Having loud conversations about how to woo coop member is uncalled for.

Ninka: I have felt fetishized in past by Eske in regards to hormonal situation. Has received comment about being a bearded woman.

Quinn: what was the context of these comment?

Ninka: Eske asked about facial hair then made comments about being a bearded woman.

Eske: wants to use whatever language Ninka wants to feel safe

Logan: Eske’s language seemed offensive, like saying a fat person is so confident

Eske: Can I call you beautiful on outside too?

Leah: how can we trust that you say you’re sorry now when you’ve been shown these behaviors are harmful.

Eske: knows they have problems, wanted to be in a situation where they are accountable to a group of people. If there is one person that doesn’t feel safe, tell them and they will leave.

Josh: putting themself in a situation where they can harm other people is wrong. Does not feel like Eske is conducive to living with other people. If someone problems with living in a social situation it is not wise to

Paul: it is 9pm. I am holding a vote to extend meeting by 30 minutes. Vote passes.

Eske: I hope to be able to stay and contribute. They care and want to make this community the best it can be, Will leave in peace if need be. Is hoping to find new housing, is this possible?

Kate: a notice will be given for whatever is chosen.

Eske leaves for vote

Cory: this discussion now would be focused on what action to take and why. No new information.

Logan: Feels remorse lies in being caught, not bad about doing things. If they felt bad about actins, they would not have continued action.

Josh: we should move to evict. Had an opportunity to correct behavior. Went through mediated meeting on how to live with people.

Cory: most egregious thing is how Phil has been treated and targeted. This was communicated that they couldn’t do that but they did it.

Logan: Eske did this multiple time after being told to stop

Cory: they went looking for someone to get sympathy from after being told not to do something

Kate: they will tell people an edited version of story in order to get sympathy. Brought up early on some stuff about Philip and Bernard. Kate told them it was not cool to bring up people past

Jill: is deeply offended by Eske’s presence.

Cayla: Eske was told specifically that their behavior was hurting someone and why this is unacceptable.

Bernard: what was done just with Phil is a direct violation of harassment. Will be voting for eviction. This is repeated.

Quinn: Wants to vote to evict because some people are not comfortable living here. We should not sacrifice good people for eske.

Paul Closes stack, begins pole

No action: none
Behavior contract: One vote
Eviction: Unanimous yes vote

Paul: we will do paper ballots for all members.
Eviction passes 21 in favor, one opposed.

New business

Cayla: Board meeting is Thursday at Sasona, there will be rides given there

meetings/2023-02-05.txt · Last modified: 2023/02/07 05:38 UTC by grahamw